writing
I learned to write when I was four. I used to start in the middle of the page and write down, and then start at the top of the page - which infuriated my teacher. I learned to write joined up when I was about six. I stopped writing joined up when I was about eleven.
Writing
I am for hire for columns, gig and music reviews.
Having travelled a lot over the last couple of years, I have been keeping a diary of my adventures. This is split into several blogs, with pictures, music and film I've produced along the way.
Most of my writing is creative: poems, lyrics and stories, but the travel blogs are (mostly) true. My life really has featured such highlights as losing all my clothes in Memphis, getting lost in the Waitakere ranges, only to be saved by a group of girls having a pool party…
I write mainly poems and short stories, but there are a couple of novels in the pipeline. I also write lyrics and songs, including some co-written for other bands, such as living brain.
Writer's Café
I am fairly active on Writer's Café. This is the best place to read my writing. I write mainly Nonsense and Erotica, but not usually at the same time.
I have received several awards for my writing.
Travel writing
Links to the blogs are on the left. This is a quick summary of what they are:
The Lovely Times
Australia, mainly Melbourne, Jan 2008
Knagaroo Stew
Australia, mainly Brisbane, August 2007–Jan 2008
Marsupial Soup
Australia, December 2006
In the Land of the Long White Cloud
September 2006
Land of the Large Things – June 2006
Blogging
I hate the word. Sometimes I hate blogs too. However, I keep they work brilliantly for travel diaries, gig and music reviews, as well as allowing me to have to have a rant now and again…
Devil's Avocado
© nathan jones MM8
I am the devil's avocado
You bought me with a tomato
from the supermarket
at the end of the road
I had a sticker on me
It said that I was ripe
I am blackened and ready
I am just your type
You walked me home
A salad just for you
But I am the devil's avocado
I have a little surprise... for you
Your pathetic attempts to peel me
Little flecks of skin
I get under your pretty nails
and under your delicate skin
I am hard
Harder than hell
I am not your average avocado
Haha! Can't you tell?
I sabotage your salad
Now it tastes incomplete
Oh, I am sooo bad!
I am the avocado of deceit!
Well, I'll eat you tomorrow
you whisper gently to me
as you shelf me in the fridge
by the houmous and the cheese
The next day you see me
a little battered and bruised
and half cut open
I look like the intimates of your muse
But I am still not ripe
Not ready to be eaten
Have an omelette instead, will you?
The eggs! They must be beaten!
I am the devil's avocado
Lord of your smelly fridge
For weeks I reign supreme
More annoying than a midge
I am the devil's avocado!
Your craziest sin
I love it when you...
Ah no! Not the bin!
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